I had some qualms about the PCT before I started. I wasn't sure if it was the right time to do it, I wasn't sure if I really, truly wanted to do it at this point in my life, I didn't want to have to readjust to real life after finishing (after all, I had only finally gotten back into the swing of things after the AT), and I didn't really feel like I was in need of another thruhike and didn't deserve it.
On the back end of the hike, I can't say much has changed. I needn't have worried about adjusting back to the "real" world after finishing, as jumping right into work made that pretty easy and its been smoother since I've made the post-trail transition before and know what to expect. But I still don't know if it was the right move (so many things throughout the hike seemed to be pulling me away from the trail), still don't know if it was the right time, still sometimes felt like I should be doing something more productive as I walked day in and day out, still can't claim that it was something I needed to do. Don't get me wrong, I absolutely loved it and I fondly think back to the trail often. It was incredibly fun and breathtakingly beautiful. It was an amazing way to get into the heart of land and see the hidden splendors of America, to walk through torrid desert, snowy mountains, hidden lakes and rainy forests. Many times I wish I could get back out there and re-live it all.
But despite whether or not it was the right time or place, there is always much to be gained from such a grand adventure, and I find myself taking a moment to reflect on the journey and what I got out of it, as one often does after so massive of an undertaking. And to be honest, at this point I can't say I learned many new lessons on this trail, for many times the PCT just reiterated what I learned from the AT. However, there are a few things that stick out:
The why determines the how. Why you do something determines how you do it. If you are forced to do it a different way, the why remains unfulfilled and discontentment ensues. My approach to this trail was much different than that of the AT. For as long as I could, I focused on the journey and experience of the PCT, not the destination. My goal (my why) was to explore, have fun, and spend time with others. This determined how I hiked, and I often found myself taking side trails to cool places, spending extra rest days with fun people, and doing things on a whim. When I was under a time crunch and in mad rush to the finish I couldn't to do those things--how I hiked drastically changed, which left my why unfulfilled.The lack of fulfilling my why made everything pointless. And because I wasn't able to do what I set out to do, I started to hate the trail, hate thruhiking, encountered immense frustration, and wanted to quit. The why determines the how. When there is disequilibrium between these two things, motivation drops and problems arise.
Progress is made by pushing your limits, then pushing further. Only then you can realize how much you can really do and see how far you can really go. I knew this already, but I vividly remember a day in the Sierras when I had hiked long and hard and my feet were in incredible pain. I pushed further than intended to a campsite. I badly wanted to stop to camp there but I wasn't happy with the options and I had the time, so I decided to again push a few miles more. I hobbled into camp in the end, nearly crippled, but I became a much stronger hiker over the next few weeks as I continued to push past the limits of what I wanted to do. There is always discomfort in this progress, and oftentimes it can be difficult to be motivated to take the great strides. Because pushing past limits is rather difficult as the desire for idleness and easiness usually kicks in. Its one of those lessons you can understand when you read it, but can only truly understand if you have actually lived it, and something you always must re-learn and re-live to learn.
And of course, I am so incredibly thankful for EVERYTHING that enabled me to take a long walk on the PCT. If nothing else, thruhiking opens your eyes to how incredible people can be and to how much we truly have. Some things/people I want to give a shout-out to:
Public Transportation: Though it was the source of stress more than a few times, I heavily relied on public transportation throughout this trip, and it saved me lots of time, money, and effort in the end. It is simply incredible to be able to hop on a plane, bus, or shuttle and get somewhere with relative ease. Don't have a car? No worries. Need to get across the country quickly? We have ways to do that too. It is amazing that we have access to such a complex system.
The US Postal Service: Imagine a world without mail... It was wonderful to be able to walk into a post office and know I could rely on them to deliver mail. I was able to mail myself things from home that I could not get in towns and send currently unwanted stuff home rather than throwing it away or carrying it. All the USPS workers were incredibly helpful and kind. This trip has made me even more appreciative of how awesome this service is. You can stick something in a box and it will arrive across the country in a few days time. And I mean, a flat rate at any weight? That's pretty awesome.
Friends/Family: From the incredible support of friends and family back home to the generous trail angels and the wonderful people I was hiking with, I am always so thankful for the amazing people in my life. Special shout-out to my mom for sending out those resupply boxes with little notice and coming out to slack-pack me, my parents for driving across the country to deliver my car in Canada, and to the Rattlesnacks-- they are what made the PCT so memorable.
PCTA Volunteers and Trail Crews: Whoever build this trail needs to teach all other trail-makers how to do it. The trail smartly climbed mountains and traversed difficult terrain with intention unmatched to any long wilderness trail I have ever been on. While I ran into only a few maintainers, the trail was (for the most part) always really well taken care of. The PCTA is an incredible organization that works to keep the trail open, safe, and wild for all people.
Firefighters: Lots of fire happening out there in the West. Mad respect for all those who risk their lives trying to contain the blaze and saving thousands of people and resources in the process.
God: Yes, he deserves much more than a shout-out. I spent many nights alone on the trail, had a few solo hitches, walked along many steep sections where tripping could be quite disastrous, and endured a lot of extreme weather. At any time along the trial something could have gone incredibly wrong, yet I made it safely through it all. Often in times of uncertainty I felt a peace wash over me. His unending protection was prominent throughout the trial.
Something people usually conclude after the end of their first long trail is "I don't really want to do that again." While this did not happen after finishing the AT, the thought crept up on me by the end of the PCT-- I realized I didn't really want to do another long trail. The AT sparked a fire for thruhiking; the PCT seemed to quench that fire. I was satisfied with what I had done but was not too eager to seek out another similar adventure. However, just as others with that same conclusion have reported, after being off trail for a while you start to get that itch again. Start to crave that fresh air and freedom, long for the days of simply walking, and yearn for nights under endless stars. It's happening. As they say of the Big Three (AT, PCT, CDT), you either do one or do them all.
